Episode 66: How to Refi Your Mind with Meg Trucano

Acquania Escarne 0:03

You are listening to the Purpose of Money podcast, a podcast where we talk about ways to build wealth and create more freedom in your life today. I am your host Acquania Escarne.

Acquania Escarne 0:19

Hey guys, welcome back to the Purpose of Money podcast .Today I'm super excited I have Meg Trucano on the show. Meg is awesome. But before I happened to her specialties, I want to tell you a little bit more about life before she became a full time entrepreneur. Meg after graduating with her PhD in psychology and landing a job in one of the most expensive cities in the country. She found herself struggling with anxiety and frustration that resulted from her out of control financial situation, and negative relationship with money. During this time, Meg barely made ends meet, but she began to change the situation starting with researching personal finance, and making lots of mistakes. Eventually, she realized that by applying the psychological principles of human motivation she learned in graduate school, she could actually achieve financial autonomy by training herself to adopt better financial habits and by reframing her relationship with money, Meg began to make steady progress toward her financial goals. She was no longer anxious about money and felt empowered to create the life she wanted to live without worrying about whether she could afford it.

Acquania Escarne 1:34

Eventually, she began to help her women, other women achieve financial autonomy and create radical transformation in their own lives by creating the Refi Your Mind program. Refi Your Mind equips women with the tools, habits and thought processes they need to achieve financial autonomy and thrive in their own lives. Make offers individualized financial mindset coaching and support. And we'll talk more about that today.

Acquania Escarne 2:03

Meg Welcome to the show, thank you so much for being a guest today.

Meg Trucano 2:07

Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited to get to talk to another woman about personal finance and money. I'm delighted.

Acquania Escarne 2:16

Yes, this is what I love to do. I love to talk to other women, I love to talk about money. I'm a money nerd in that way. And that's why I'm super excited. One of my clients actually connected us. And that's what I love about this industry, how you can meet awesome people. And those awesome people will introduce you to other dope people, and you have conversations to share with my podcast audience. So my first question for you, because in reading your bio, and even talking to you, I was very intrigued by your story and how you were inspired to help other women with their money and specifically to accomplish financial autonomy. But before we happen to what you're great at, I wanted to know, what was money like for you when you were growing up?

Meg Trucano 3:03

Yeah, um, first of all, I love this question. And it's something that I work with my clients a lot early on in the Refi Your Mind program, because it's super important. And a lot of people don't understand or realize, I guess that how money is treated in your home in your home of origin really does influence how you perceive money as an adult. And it's not always a one to one correlation. So for example, it's not always the case that you're repeating patterns that you saw growing up, although sometimes that does happen. Sometimes it's you do the exact opposite of what you saw growing up, but either either way, it's having an impact on how you perceive money now. And so I love this idea of like a financial origin story, right? Like every superhero has an origin story, And they overcame adversity. And until you acknowledge your own financial origin story, you know, you can't move forward in a non judgmental or productive way. So all that to say, I love this idea of kind of acknowledging where you came from.

Meg Trucano 4:15

But for me, I grew up in the Midwest, largely middle class family. We moved around a lot and we lived in mostly rural places. So the Dakotas and Wyoming where your dollar could kind of go a little further. And I don't really recall being super aware of money when I was a very small child. But then, when I got into middle school, I became acutely aware of what our family could afford what our family couldn't afford. And I would just never ask for something that I knew our family couldn't afford. So it was never explicitly mentioned, but I definitely intuited for In my environment, you know, what was appropriate for us to even ask for, there was a lot of tension between my mom and my dad were now divorced. But they, they did have a lot of tension around money. And so it sort of became, for me this thing, this like, kind of a key thing that you don't want to talk about. And it's kind of a necessary evil. But then, you know, like most kids in the United States who, and this country does not have a formalized way of educating kids about finance, you know, I had no idea what money was even about how to work with it, how to make good decisions with it. And so I kind of came away from my childhood with mostly money is kind of bad, and I don't really want to have to deal with it. And so that's kind of how I entered my adult life is I don't really like money, and I don't really want to have to deal with it. So.

Acquania Escarne 5:56

And yet you help people with their money. So what was the breaking point for you to make you change your relationship with money, so you could thrive?

Meg Trucano 6:04

Yeah, so that for me happened after I graduated from grad school. And I moved to DC, which is a huge buy by Indiana standards, which is where I was coming from a huge, expensive city. And, you know, I got a job that I was being paid good money, right. So it would have been really good in Indiana if the cost of living was much lower, right. And so I came to the city. And all of a sudden, I was paycheck to paycheck, and I was spending about 60% of my take home pay on rent, which is just absurd lessons and what not to do certainly. You know, and in retrospect, I probably could have done something different for housing, gotten roommates or done things like that. But I was so new to like, the whole situation that I didn't even think about it that way. So here I am living paycheck to paycheck, also starting to date, a bunch of men that were just terrible news for me, and just, it wasn't going well, I wasn't enjoying my time in DC. And then all of a sudden, it just hit me like, you are not living the life that you want. What are you doing?

Meg Trucano 7:19

And so, from that point, I was like, Alright, no more crappy men. And it got serious. And I found a budgeting software that helped me make a budget, I made a plan for tackling my student debt, which by the way, had been deferred for five years because I was in graduate school, and then all of a sudden, I get a job. And oh, no, I have to pay back this huge amount of money. So I never really had practice doing it. I made all the mistakes. But I learned from those mistakes. And I educated myself, I read all the personal finance literature that you could get your hands on. And as you know, there's lots of good literature. There's lots of really bad literature, too, that has like, it's just not great. So I made a ton of mistakes. But that's kind of how I change began to change my relationship with money.

Acquania Escarne 8:18

And I think that's good. Because we learn from mistakes, we learn from mentors, we can learn from reading and learning and education. But sometimes it's a combination that's required for the brain to actually get it and to decide to do things differently. So I like that you're honest and transparent about that journey. And now you're in a much better position, because you can bank on that experience. If ever you get in a position where you're torn between how to spend money or how to treat money, you will make the best decision because you've been there and you've literally done that you've lived paycheck to paycheck. So you're like, I'm not going back. So now, my question to you is because I noticed the language of your bio, you say financial autonomy, and sometimes we call it financial freedom. But is it a difference for you? What exactly does financial autonomy mean?

Meg Trucano 9:12

Yeah, again, really excellent question. So Refi Your Mind when I created it, I sort of built it on the principles that I learned getting my doctorate in psychology and I, I studied the psychology of motivation, which is kind of a subsection of sub discipline of developmental psychology. But I'm using the word autonomy in a very intentional, very specific way. And it comes from the self determination theory literature, which is a very nerdy way of saying, but autonomy means self directed action. So financial autonomy means the freedom and ability for women to do what they want with their money when they want to do it. And essentially, it's about control You know, you control your thoughts, you control your behavior, and therefore you control your money. And financial autonomy is really the end goal of for all of my clients and the Refi Your Mind program. And there's tons of different ways to get there, which is the fun part. But if you want to think about it in a really concrete way, it's the difference between, I get to spend money on something so my child's education, or my dream home, or an excellent vacation summer, I get to spend that money is the difference between that and I have to spend money on something. So I have to pay my debt back, I have to make ends meet, I have to figure out a way to not live paycheck to paycheck. So this idea of control and autonomy is extremely important when it comes to motivation to make any change. So it's kind of the first step of believing that you can make change. And then the end goal, which is, as you said, it's financial freedom, but it's also it's more in your mind, it's like, I do what I want with my money when I want to.

Acquania Escarne 11:15

I love that. And that's what a lot of people strive to do is to have control control of their day, their finances, how they spend their time, and now what they spend their money on. And there's so many essentials that we have to pay, we have to pay for housing, we have to pay utilities, we have to pay student loans. So I love how you, you know, kind of phrase it in a way where the motivation is being able to choose and having that power, I see it as power. Yeah, power to choose and, and having that control. So that's pretty awesome. What are some tips that you give your clients that help them improve their financial mindset?

Meg Trucano 11:54

Yeah, so I think I have kind of boils down to three tips. So the first is that if anybody is is listening, and they're experiencing financial anxiety, or some kind of blockage around money, or they know their money, mindsets kind of messed up, definitely reach out to me, or reach out to a professional that does something similar, because, or, you know, seek a therapist, but a lot of therapists don't necessarily have the tools to be able to help you specifically with your finances. I like to use the example of something's going wrong with your fireplace, and you could call your handyman, maybe they could help. But what you really need to call is the chimney sweep, because they only deal with fireplaces, and they only, you know, that's their expertise. So that's my first tip is that if you're really struggling with this, reach out, reach out for help, it is absolutely something that, you know, we shouldn't be expected to go it alone.

Meg Trucano 12:51

Um, second, is kind of gets back to what we were talking about before with our financial origin stories, but I really advise my clients to be courageous and to own their own current financial situations and forgive themselves for past financial mistakes. And then from there, you can commit to making positive change moving forward. But there's no point in moving forward if you haven't acknowledged where you are, understand how the past affects your present, and then move forward. So that's the second tip, definitely easier said than done.

Meg Trucano 13:29

But then finally, my my most powerful tip is super simple. But it's super powerful. So Carol Dweck, she's the person who pioneered this idea of mindset and mindset has taken on a life of its own in the kind of vernacular. And pretty much everybody now has heard of the fixed mindset and the growth mindset. But she has a really powerful tool called the power of yet. And so to kind of back it up, and in case somebody is not familiar with mindset, and I'm going to grossly summarize here, folks with a fixed mindset, really believe that you have a fixed amount of intelligence or talent, and any failure is interpreted as evidence that you're stupid, or untalented? Or whatever the case may be. So because they believe that there's only a certain amount of intelligence, any evidence that says, Oh, you're not good at this thing means that you're just, it's impossible. So you might as well try something else. As a result, they tend to really shy away from challenging situations and prefer to engage in easier things, things that they can excel at so that they can appear intelligent. So that's fixed mindset. And by contrast, folks with a growth mindset really believe that you can you can get better you can grow your intelligence you can grow your talent, and you can become better at something. And so instead of interpreting challenges as a treat, they interpret it as like an opportunity to learn more about this thing. And so they use failure as information about what they can do differently next time to achieve a different outcome.

Meg Trucano 15:20

And so, growth mindset folks, again, are really more interested in learning and becoming smarter, becoming better at a thing. And fixed mindset folks are a lot more focused on just like, appearing smart, like, I don't really need to be an expert, just think I'm an expert. I'm. So taking a step back to the power of yet one of the easiest, simplest ways to reframe a fixed mindset thought, or sometimes we call them limiting limiting beliefs. So, for example, the limiting belief of I'm not good with money, take that statement, and add the word yet. And instantaneously, you've transformed it from a fixed thought to a growth thought, so I'm not good with money yet, or I'm not good at investing yet. It basically means that you've given yourself the opportunity to learn more about something to practice something. And so changing fixed mindset patterns and transforming them into growth patterns, is kind of one of the fundamental goals of the Refi Your Mind program. But that tiny little yet it does so much of just opening up the possibility for future for future growth. So to sum up, find yourself a professional, forgive yourself for past mistakes, and definitely utilize the power of yet.

Acquania Escarne 16:51

I love it. Those are really good summaries. And I'd never actually heard of that. I know a lot about mindset, but the actual putting the yet on the end of it. I have a book called The Power of Yes. And always trying to get improv improv getting to a solution or a compromise that works for individuals and businesses. But I'm gonna look into this further, because yet is even more powerful. It changes the mind to process it as something that's possible. And it gives it hope. And that's sometimes all we need. And I really like that. So thank you for sharing that today.

Meg Trucano 17:25

Yeah, sure. And you can definitely, just to plug Carol Dweck work a little bit more. She has a it's called Self Theories of Intelligence is her more academic book. And then she's, I think, got a book called Mindset. That's just it's more for a non academic audience. But all of that information is in there, if anybody wants another book recommendation, so

Acquania Escarne 17:49

Okay, I'll make sure to include that in the show notes. And we will link to that. But this show is all about celebrating women also, and I want to celebrate you on becoming one of the newest, full time entrepreneurs. When we first spoke, I was really excited to hear that you were progressively working your way up to full time entrepreneurship. And this is what this podcast is all about empowering women to take charge. And if they want to, to quit their jobs so they can pursue their passions. So I'd love to hear more about your journey. And what tips do you have for someone who might be considering building up the courage and the finances to become a full time financial mindset coach, or anything else they desire to do?

Meg Trucano 18:41

Yeah. Before I get into my story, I just want to reach out to anybody in the audience and give them courage. It takes an immense amount of courage. And, you know, I had, I was very fortunate and that I had a lot of people in my corner a lot of people that are like, yeah, just do it, like, do it, absolutely do it. Many women, you know, women supporting women. But it you know, sometimes you just got to do it, you got to just pull the trigger and do it. That's not to say you shouldn't prepare for doing it. But definitely, you know, moving forward with energy, I think, you know, has can pay dividends. So my story is that, you know, after I got my PhD, I landed in a job doing education policy research, and I spent about eight years doing that. But I had this awesome collection of I like to call them work wives, and they're like, they're my ladies at work and we would always just chat about anything and everything, but we would talk about money a lot. And we would talk about various things like you know how to talk to your spouse and have a really hard conversation about different priorities. or maybe talking about, you know, budgeting software, we have our favorite. So, over time, I started to talk to more and more of my work wives about this. And it felt awesome. Like, it felt so incredible to be connecting with these women. And so I started a side hustle, I started Refi Your Mind, and I was still working full time. But being the researcher that I am, I piloted the program first with several women, and I refined the program based on their feedback. So I feel like I did my due diligence to my background as a as a researcher, but what really decided it for me was that I would be working these 10 hour days, you know, it's, it can be really tough. You know, I was a federal contractor, so we would be doing a lot of education policy research for federal clients. And that it's, it's takes a lot of time, right. And it's, it's very intense at times.

Meg Trucano 21:00

So I would work these 10 hour days, and I would have an appointment with a client afterwards. And I would just be totally exhausted. But I would have this conversation and help this woman through whatever she was struggling with. And I would get out of that appointment. And I would just be like Ha and I had like 16 cups of coffee, and I just felt so energized. You know, like, it was just fantastic. And so after several instances of this, I was like, Alright, this is it, this is what I got to do. And when I made the decision to leave my nine to five job, I was very mathematical about it. I was like, What do my husband and I need to do to cut back on expenses so that I can save three months of my salary, just as a fallback. And to have that kind of saved away. And I've literally just counted backwards. And so I think, I think it took me some time it took me several months to to do this. But yeah, after that, I kind of put in my notice. And here I am, I took a little time after to kind of get myself straight and take some much needed rest time. But it was the best decision I've ever made. And even if, you know, I hope to be extremely successful and work with many, many, many women. But even if I only work with the women that I've already worked with, it's totally worth it. Because the transformations that they've made is just amazing.

Acquania Escarne 22:30

That's what it's about guys to transformation and helping people if you pursue the passion you love, and you're genuinely helping other people, it'll pay off for you in the long run. So congratulations Meg welcome to full time entrepreneurship. And the name of the podcast is called the Purpose of Money. So I asked all my guests my signature question, what is your purpose for money.

Meg Trucano 22:56

So my purpose for money is to empower women, to ditch their financial anxiety, to step into their power and to own their finances and to become financially autonomous. And this is really important to me. And I actually believe this is a social justice issue. Because when women have money, the world changes. When you have money, you can put your money behind what matters to you, whether that's funding your children's education, or whether that is positively impacting your community, or even financially supporting candidates that look like you and represent you to the government. These are all possibilities when you have control of your money. So in my opinion, money is one of the biggest mechanisms for social change that we have available to us. Money is a resource. And I get a lot in my my work with clients, I get a lot of like this unspoken moralization of money, right? Like people who have money are bad, or people who have money are evil. And that's simply not true. Money is a resource. There are plenty of really awesome people with a lot of money, or a lot of really big jerks with a lot of money. There are a lot of wonderful people that don't have any money, and a lot of really terrible people that don't have any money. So it's really, I try to emphasize that that money doesn't have its own moral power. But when you have your own money, and you have control over it, you get to decide what kind of change that you want to see in the world and you get to make that a reality. So it's my purpose for money to give women the tools, habits and mindsets to be able to experience that for themselves.

Acquania Escarne 24:47

Excellent answer and I like it very different, but definitely fits with your personality and the passion that you have. So definitely on brand. Now I want my listeners to be able to Find you follow you and check out your program so please take an opportunity to plug all your social media platforms and website.

Meg Trucano 25:09

Thank you. So again, I'm Meg Trucano. And you can find me at RefiYourMind.com It's R E F I your minds.com I have a Facebook page RefiYourMind.com. I'm on Instagram as M Trucano T r u c a n o. But better yet, if any of this sounds interesting to you, if you know anybody who could benefit from this program, shoot me an email at Meg@Refiyourmind.com and we can set up a free 30 minute exploration call to see if Refi your mind could help you out. So thank you so much for having me. I'm so delighted to be here.

Acquania Escarne 25:52

You are most welcome and we're happy to have you anytime. So you heard it guys go check out her website. Follow Meg on social media. And if you're interested, get that consultation so you can find out if her program is best for you. Meg thanks again for being a guest on the show. For those who are listening. If you like it, please share it. And don't forget to leave a five star review wherever you may be listening. Until next time, keep building generational wealth.

Acquania Escarne 26:21

Thank you for listening to the Purpose of Money podcast. For more resources and information check out my website the Purpose of Money.com and while you're there, please sign up for our newsletter so you have the latest information on new episodes and blog posts. Until next time, keep creating freedom in your life today.

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