Episode 56: How to Walk In Your Purpose With Victoria Danielle

Acquania Escarne 0:03

You are listening to the Purpose of Money Podcast, a podcast where we talk about ways to build wealth and create more freedom in your life today. I am your host Acquania Escarne.

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Hey everybody, welcome back to the Purpose of Money Podcast. I'm super excited to have Victoria Danielle on the show today. Victoria Danielle is a speaker, teacher and leadership coach who helps ambitious professionals walk in their purpose, own their power, steward their time and maximize their finances to create freedom and flexibility. She is a one on one coach with a signature six month mastermind program, and a myriad of speaking engagements. She equips leaders with the tools needed to serve others from a full cup, while still being true to themselves and to their values. Utilizing the lessons learned from her own experience and her years of teaching, investment advising, and ICF professional coaching training. She's able to guide her clients from a place of fatigue, fear, scattered thoughts, and stress to vibrancy, confidence, focus and tranquility. Her mission is to influence as many women as she can to live an abundant life.

Victoria Danielle, thank you so much for doing what you do. And welcome to the Purpose of Money Podcast.

Victoria Danielle 1:42

Yes, thank you for having me. So happy to be here.

Acquania Escarne 1:46

Yes, this is super awesome. I've been looking forward to this conversation. We met virtually on Instagram. And I was just really passionate and inspired by your content and how you're engaging with your audience. So I had to have you on the show. And I wanted to talk specifically about your experience as a full time entrepreneur, your background coming from that finance space, and how you're currently helping women through your mastermind group. But before we dive into all of that, I would love to know, what are some of the things you feel that is holding women back from reaching their highest potential?

Victoria Danielle 2:25

Okay, so that is a great question. I've seen a lot of things with having different clients. And I'd say the top ones are is probably the main one, and then be your spokes off to a bunch of different things, whether it be fear of failure, sometimes it's even fear of success, they feel that they might lose themselves, or fear that they might lose some of their values if they become too successful. And they're afraid of that fear of what others might say, and the fear of just not being able to do it all the way. Sometimes they want to come out of the gate perfect. And instead of leaning into the process in the journey of things. And so oftentimes, I'll see them wanting more, wanting to be able to live up to their full potential, but just so afraid to do it messy and to do it in a way to where they envision themselves 10 years down the road, but it's okay, you're in year one. So those are the biggest things. And there's a thing that I've said a few times where it's someone else's best, could very well be your box. And that's just about comparing looking at other people's journeys and thinking that, okay, I have to do what just like that. I say learn the principles from the journey. But how they did it may not be your walk, it could very well be limiting for you. You have to think about who you are and what works for you. And those are probably the top things but I can just think of at the top of my head that really do hold, a lot of women that when it comes to reaching their full potential.

Acquania Escarne 4:18

I love what you just said some women's best is another woman's box that is powerful. And I think that we do that a lot because social media is images of all of this quote unquote success that another person has been able to have. And we never can really fact check that so some women may embody that as being the full truth. And then using that, like you said to compare their journey to someone else's, and not really knowing the details of that other person's journey could also misguide you to believing that they didn't work as hard because it looks easy on social media, but they may have gone through the valley with prayer and purpose have come out to the top. And you didn't see any of that because they weren't posting the dark times of their journey or when they struggled the most. And I also feel the same way in that sometimes you want to keep a part of your journey to yourself. And that's why you may not be as transparent about the darker times. And so I love that I think that's a powerful statement. And it's so true, that when we're embarking on our own personal finance journey, we need to remember it's personal. And I think we should be just more supportive of other people who are in other phases, cheering them on along the way, maybe even talking to them to see some of the things they did. But not necessarily saying that's exactly how I need to do it too. Because we also have different starting points, one person may have significant consumer debt, credit card debt, or student loans. And another person may just have not learned how to handle money, but they don't necessarily have debt, and therefore their journey could just be educating themselves, and getting accountability partners.

So I love what you said. And as a coach, I'm sure you have to remind your clients of that all the time. Because I do it too. In my practice, where I'm reminding clients, your personal finance journey is a marathon. And we're going to celebrate the small and a large milestones along the way. And then if we have setbacks, we're just gonna regroup and try to figure out okay, how do we overcome this? So that's powerful. I also wanted to ask you about balance, what is balancing it all mean to you? And do you think that's possible? If you do think it's possible? What tips do you have for my listeners on how to balance it all? Life, work life, everything,

Victoria Danielle 6:48

Okay, So balance is one of the things, the main things that clients will come to me around the phrases I hear a lot of time are, I've got all of these roles, I'm trying to be a mom, I'm trying to be a wife, I'm a business owner, I'm a volunteer, I'm doing this endeavor, that endeavor, whatever it is, it's like all the hats, that's another phrase and trying to juggle all of the hats, they just feel so overwhelmed by all the quote unquote, roles. And what they learned after coaching and through the journey is that once they're very clear on who they are, a lot of times, we're so focused on what to do, if I've got to figure out the schedule, I have to figure out the right planner for me, maybe it's not the bullet planner, maybe it's another planner, I just have to figure out the right plan, I have to figure out the right schedule, I've got the strategy, we're figuring we're trying to figure out all the what all of the external stuff, the tools and strategies. But what I say is before you can do all those things, not to say that they're not important, you have to be super clear on who you are.

Because once we're clear on who we are, and that's different for each person, then you decide to be able to walk in each space with that with who you are. And so one of the easiest ways to get clear, it's encompassing of so many different things of who you are. But one of the biggest ones are your values, I find that a lot of women, their values are like this thing that's kind of in the back of their head. But it's something that's never truly been communicated. Put on paper, said out loud, really, these are the tenants of my life. These are a pillar by which I am moving. Once you're clear on I say your top five to seven values, then you take that. And as you're making decisions, as you're planning the day, as you're managing your time managing your finances, it's about your values and the core of who you are. And then you can decide to essentially get rid of the hat, you get rid of the roles.

And when we think about the definition of a role, it's something that you're acting out, like a play a television show or a movie. And in any of those things, at some point, that actress that actor, they have to set that role down and go into real life is we're always thinking about everything as a role we're playing. Yes, you will be overwhelmed. Yes, you will be exasperated because you're trying to fill a role. Whereas if you know who you are, you go into each space as who you are. I don't now have to try to balance how can I be mom? And how can I be wise and how can I know my values in this moment in this time when it's time then make a decision, what do my values tell me? And sometimes my values will tell me, You know what? Yes, there are three things on my calendar right now that are very important. But one of these things are much more important. And my values are going to tell me which one is more important. And so that is where we essentially get rid of the whole balancing act. And we begin to integrate who we are into how we live our life, and it becomes a bit more harmonious, versus trying to balanace.

And so that's what I'd say is being clear on who you are, that will then guide you and your decision making, whether it's what should or should not be on my plate. What's important, what's more important, I think of it as four categories as we go over things. And that is, think of how you want to manage your life and your time in these kind of four categories, if you will. There's your Advil, your vitamin, your candy, or crack. And that fourth one is prescription.

And so your Advil, those are things that are super important, I need to take care of it right now is urgent, too many of us live the majority of our life in the space, you don't want to live your life, but does life bring it there? Yes. But you don't want to live 80% of your life. So you want to find a way to reduce that. Then the other category is that vitamin just like your life is I spend time doing the things that no, it's not like super urgent now, but it really does add value and quality of life. I need to begin to prioritize my vitamin like thoughts, path, what you may call it in that place, and really try to live the majority of my life there. That is where we begin to feel more centered and more grounded. The third category where we talked about that candy or crack, those are the things that really don't add value, none whatsoever, but they're ever so sweet, ever, so enticing the social media, just wasting time, if you will, we looked up and it's oh, it's two hours, I've been scrolling for two hours, that space doing a bunch of stuff that really doesn't add any value, to quality of life for us. And then when I say prescription, that's when you put on your pharmacists hat and you say, You know what, these are things that are important. But I'm going to ask someone else to fill this prescription out. This is for you. Some of us are taking on others, journeys, especially for moms and wives, sometimes you're taking on our spouses, our key their issues, things that they can figure out for themselves, but it's about empowering someone else, to figure it out, empowering someone else to get the job done. Sometimes it's even housework, what you may call it another word is delegation. But I see delegation as something that's not just housework and things like that. It's sometimes mental things that we've been taking on, and we need to go ahead and empower someone else to solve their own problem.

Acquania Escarne 13:21

That's deep, that's deep delegation, value based life, like knowing who you are, is really important. And I think what you're saying it resonates with me specifically, because I'm one of those people, who is a mom, who is a wife, who is an entrepreneur, who is a nine to fiver, who is trying to find a way to make time for all my priorities. And I definitely think we as a community, don't spend enough time discussing our values and having conversations about our values. So a lot of people haven't written it down, they haven't thought it through. And they're therefore they're not making decisions based on that. And then we are also sometimes taught, we have to do it all whether it's because we tell ourselves, we can't afford to delegate, because we don't either have the money or we don't have the ability to let someone else do it. And I think people fail to realize when we try to do too much. And then we tell ourselves, it can't be delegated. It's just not done well. And so recently, for example, my husband and I are both busy. I'm managing the nine to five in the business. He has a consulting gig that's really time intensive, and he's managing several projects. So there was a time where he was cooking a lot for the family. And then he suddenly got busy again, as life goes back to normal. And we were finding ourselves eating out and we have two young kids and so when you're eating out with young kids, you're spending more money to do it. And you're delivering it, which is the fees that come with that are crazy. And so me the financial savvy person was like, this is not adding up. And it's not balancing with my health conscious side that's working out three to four times a week and trying to actually live a better, healthier life, because a lot of the options were not the healthiest options.

So we compromise, he makes a joke about this, I had an idea he disagreed. My idea won, that's our idea of compromise. But recently, I had my virtual assistant look for local chefs in the area that could deliver to our house and I found this amazing African American male shout out to Craig, who comes to our house to drop off food. And the price we pay per meal is cheaper than the price we were paying to deliver takeout that would only last a meal, whereas his meals will last. And it just makes more sense. And we feel good, and it's healthier. And it's supporting another black business. This is like all of what I want to do. I want to support black businesses, I want to live a healthier life, I want to lose weight that is in line with my values versus we both haven't cooked less eat out. And let's just continue to do what we know isn't working and letting it go, my husband had to let go of the fact that he didn't have time to cook anymore. Although he loved to do it. He didn't have the time.

So sometimes you have to just be honest, like, I cannot do this anymore. But if I want to do it occasionally, great. You can cook on the days, Craig doesn't, I just wanted to share a practical application of everything you just said and how I'm choosing to live my life based on my values. And delegate, even though it took communication, and even just trying it. That's what I had to tell my husband, we're not hiring Craig forever. We're just going to try it for a weekend. Let's see how it goes. And then we tried him again. And now he's like, when is Craig coming? It's not as expensive as people think when you look around, I had to go look it up, a couple of people ended up finding him on Thumbtack, actually, but when I spoke to him, we really connected. And I saw that there a purpose behind his business. And the fact that he's been a chef for 30 years and really puts that love and attention into the meals and could cater to different diets. And I have different allergies in my family. And so it was perfect, we feel better, we sleep better, it's all around. So words wise, I guess we just said all that say hire a chef. No, I'm just kidding. If you can afford it, if you need it, if it's in your budget, try it out. But be willing to delegate be willing to make decisions based on your values. And that was my most recent value based decision.

I have another question for you. Because you also help some of your clients figure out what they want to do. I know some people come to you and they're very clear. I want to accomplish X, Y, and Z. And you walk them through that. But I know some of your other clients may be very creative minded people with 1000 ideas. How do you get them to focus on just one?

Victoria Danielle 18:19

So yeah, so I do have them. And I'd say even some of the ones who know exactly what they want, they still because they're just creative beings, they just will get flooded with ideas, which I understand that life because I'd say I'm very similar in that way as well is that having an idea is not a problem for me. And it goes back to values. Right? When you are super clear on who you are, what your values are, you're clear on the mission that you truly feel called to at this time at this moment. And then it is easier to make the decision that sometimes through walking it out and talking with them and asking them enough questions and being inquisitive, they will begin to talk about themselves and get to the understanding of what I had five of these ideas. Two of these can be combined. And the other three, I just came up with those because I just thought those make money. And so they will figure that out a lot of times when I begin to ask them the motive behind a lot of their ideas. What is it that important to them about that? Why is it something that they're wanting to do now versus later and then just having those types of dialogue allows them to be able to self realize as I'm talking this out loud with you as you're asking me some questions that I didn't even think of, this is the one or none of them are the one, or you know what some of this is later, I'm really am working on something, I saw something shiny and I got distracted, that is for a back pocket. But even though it's the back pocket, I will just do one small set to go towards that versus trying to make it my full focus.

And that is how I'm able to help them be able to really narrow down what it is that we should be focusing on for them and what's best for them at this moment. And sometimes I have to even call them out, they'll say I maybe I could come to me with one goal, like the overarching goal of maybe looking to build a salon if you will. And then as we're talking as we're going to session. Next thing I know, I'm hearing online courses and hearing retreat, and I'm like, oh, whoa, let me point out something. And I noticed, we started off saying that we were working towards this salon, and now I'm hearing retreated, I'm hearing courses, and sometimes it boils down to start to get a little frayed. And I started to think that this idea that felt so right and so good to me a week ago, starting to the fear of starting to set in. So maybe the other stuff makes more sense. And just everyone's different. But a lot of times that's the common thread that I see of having all of these ideas and then trying to figure out someone and just bringing them back to their center of what's your value, what is it that you're really being called to?

Acquania Escarne 21:45

That's really powerful. And I think that kind of goes back to what you said in the beginning how fear is keeping a lot of women from reaching their full potential because they have a great idea. It's been validated, they've probably even tested it with their audience. And they know it's going to work. But the fear of accomplishing something so huge, is making them scared to proceed with it. But I recently learned whenever you have fear, it's really important to just call on God for the direction, I get a lot of ideas in my dreams, I think that's how God chooses to speak to me. And when I wake up, it's very clear what I'm supposed to do, right. And I literally this year was going to do this huge virtual event. And I had the DJ in mind and the curriculum and how I was going to outline this agenda and it was going to be huge. And then I had a vision to create a course, which I've been selling myself, you need to create a course people need to really understand how you've been able to build wealth, how you've been able to invest in hotels, what exactly did you do? People are asking all the time. But I was like I've never made a course before. I'm not sure if I can do it. And so I did ask a lot of questions, read a couple things started following a lot of big course makers out there just to get those tips and ideas. And then my coach was like, Just do it. Like you have the knowledge and expertise. And you are packaging your own knowledge and expertise. So there's no validating, that needs to happen. You don't need to prove yourself to anyone else, because you've been proving yourself every day with your consistency, your clients and your business. So I was like she's right. And I made the course. I put myself on a deadline to where I published it, to be honest, before it was even fully done. Because once I had people in it, and I told them, hey, you're a beta user for the course. I'm going to give you a new module every week. But we're gonna work together, I'll coach you, I'll get feedback, you give me your feedback. And we're gonna get through this together. And by requiring a new module to be due every single week, I had the pressure to deliver and I'm a person of my word. I did it I delivered the six modules. Within the end of the six weeks. I coached the first users. I got amazing feedback.

My first person fully finished and gave me some feedback that really inspired me. And then they suggested things to add that I hadn't thought about which is really important getting that feedback. But I will say in the beginning when I was doing the free webinars to encourage people to sign up. I wasn't getting the conversion rate that I had in mind. And I was wondering like God, is this really what you wanted me to do? You told me to do this. I did it. And then it's not like selling like hotcakes. But then I realized something that one, it's getting the right people that need it right now. Because my beta users have had a transformation that even I wasn't expecting there, you know how you have a plan, this is the six things you're going to learn and you're going to be able to execute when you're done. But then they had other things, they share that I was like, wow, I wasn't expecting that. Or even a woman who presumed to be well educated about her finances, signed up for the course. And I tell you, the devil got in my head and was like, That's not your target client, like, she's not going to get anything out of this course, because she's too advanced. And she got so much like, in the middle of the course, she wrote a testimony that brought me to tears. And I said, only the devil would have me believe that I wasn't serving God and doing this, and serving her. And I had doubt that she wasn't my target audience. And then she you never know what people are going through, because then her testimony just proved that she was my target audience. And I had convinced myself she wasn't. And for her to get the reward out of the course. And the way she did was inspired me to keep going. And so from that whole experience, I just learned, be consistent. Listen to God.

And most recently, again, I had a dream that I needed to email my list again about the course and let them know, I've decided to extend the coaching for beta users. I didn't think this would be a big deal. But I was like, people need to know this, I got a sale, a full price sale, because when I was initially selling it, I was selling it at a discount, a full price sale the same day, I sent that email. And that is the confirmation. I need, in my spiritual journey as well to know like, just listen to in all things, but especially in your business. Yeah. Because as my CEO, he's telling me what I need to do. And even if you don't have 100 sales the first day, they trickle in and trickle in more trickle in, I partnered with an organization who gave the course to some of their members. So it's a progression, right? I don't know, I went on this tangent. But what you said just resonated with me. And it brought that to my mind that people need to understand, especially if they're full time entrepreneurs, or aspiring full time entrepreneurs, that when you follow God, and what he wants you to create, you will be successful. Even if you don't think his success. On day one, it takes a couple of days of work, months of work time commitment, consistency, but it will pay off. And now I'm at a point where I'm like, Okay, I know what I'm doing. I know what I need to do. And I know who I'm helping. It's very clear, and I need to continue on this journey.

Victoria Danielle 27:48

So you brought up a great point. So you were saying God speaks to me through my dreams. And one of the things that my clients we work through as a part of who you are, is one of them is how does God speak to you? Because there are different ways that you can speak to us. And there's feeler, your seer, you're hearer. And that fourth one is knower. And so when you're saying dreams, it's like the seers. Those are the ones who will get a vision. Those are the ones a lot of times he'll speak to them through their dream those or seers and then hearer those are the ones that are like I really is this voice that I hear it sounds like my own voice that I know is different from me. Even I've made these I'm journaling it comes up like those are your your feelers are those where you can walk in the room and you feel if something's off, you feel someone walk by and you just feel that shift, you're feelers. Knowers it's harder. Sometimes they feel like God doesn't speak to them. But they do. Those are the ones who really can just go off of their instincts and their gut. It's like a gut knowing. I can't tell you why I don't know how but I just know my husband is very much like that. He's a knower where I came from, I just know.

And it's super important to know that and so yes, I'm with you. It's me being able to hear from him. I believe what I'm doing is that was a big moment of him speaking to me, there was a vision he gave me because I questioned coaching. I looked at coaching as a little side eye, if you will, who wants this? Why this is a little inaudible, no, but for me, if he gave me the vision of my goal, my mission is to be able to help others be effective for His kingdom and to bring glory to his name. That's it. Now you could go off and make great money in your business. You can get more five, whatever it is, and more team members great but at the end of the day, it's also that you can be more effective for His kingdom. bring glory, to his name. And the vision that he gave me was around swimming, swimming lessons. And he's shown me that a lot of us go to church, we're going in and out every Sunday, and the pastor is giving the sermon. And it's almost as though we're getting swim lessons. And they're trying to show us how to swim from the sidelines. They're standing up on the side, and they're saying, You should do your arm this way, and your legs this way, and we're listening, we're trying and trying to swim, and some people may go, and they are able to learn how to swim from someone teaching them from the sidelines.

But God told me that, and you can jump in the water. And I'm in there with you. And so I'm able to point out, as you might start to do your arm a different way, I'm able to say, Hey, I noticed that you did your arm that way. Tell me what's going on. And so then we're able to have this conversation where now you're learning with someone right there with you. I'm in the journey with you, I'm in the pool with you. Versus it's me giving these inspirational lessons. And again, they all have their place, right? They do. But some of us really do need someone on the sidelines. And then others of us need someone in the pool. And that's what he caught me to. And so since that day, I'd say I have yet ever never gotten on the call. So where I'm like questioning is this right is literally is this every time I get on a call with a client, I feel so much more energized, I am alive because I know I'm doing what he called me to do.

Acquania Escarne 31:48

Yes, that is so powerful. And it's so important. I have loved this conversation. I love the direction that we went to be transparent about our faith and our businesses and our following our purpose. And so I do have a question for you, because the name of the podcast is called the Purpose of Money. And I ask all my guests a signature question, what is your purpose for money?

Victoria Danielle 32:11

So I really love that question. Because not a lot of people stop to even ask how they view that what do you believe your purpose of money is. And so for me, and if those of you have heard earlier, I come from a world where I was investment advisor. And so I have experienced in it. But for me, money really boils down to it's a tool, I get to decide how it's going to be used. So sometimes for me, that tool is going to be used to really take care of my needs, be able to put a roof over our head, food on the table that stuff those needs. Other times it's going to come into play, that tool is going to be used to be able to take care of other times it's to be able to allow for that flexibility, that freedom, I get to decide how the tool is used. And that's really what I believe that how I look at the purpose of money is I control it, it doesn't control me. And I get to decide and have autonomy over how it will be used and whatever moment and then however God asked me to see fit for it to be used. And so I just tried to steward it in the best way that I know with the knowledge that I have, but then also hearing from him as the Holy Spirit believe in God. And so it's just a tool.

Acquania Escarne 33:34

Yes, absolutely. I love that answer. And without further ado, Victoria, Danielle, I would love for you to tell my listeners, where can we find you, I want them to follow you. I want them to check out your website, and your services if they're interested. So drop all your handles and your website.

Victoria Danielle 33:53

Sure, you can follow me on all platforms, whether it's Facebook or Instagram, as well as my website. It's under the Victoria Danielle. So that is T H E Victoria Danielle.com. And then at the Victoria Danielle, whether on Instagram or Facebook. And if you go to my website, there's a resource a free resource that pops up right away. I have several but one of them is because this is an investment in a coach. And I want you to be well equipped and not waste that investment. And so I have a resource where there's questions you can ask yourself and assessment to see if you're ready for coaching, whether it's with me or anyone else. And also questions to ask another coach before hiring them to make sure that you're not hiring someone just based off a personality but they are the right fit for you. So I have that resource available on my website.

Acquania Escarne 34:46

That's awesome. Check it out, folks. I'll make sure to include all the links and websites in the show notes. As usual, if you love this episode, please leave a review and don't forget to like subscribe or share with anyone else that can use it. Until next time, I want you guys to keep building generational wealth. Thanks again Victoria Danielle for being on the show.

Victoria Danielle 35:08

Thanks for having me.

Acquania Escarne 35:09

Thank you for listening to the Purpose of Money podcast. For more resources and information, check out my website, the purposeofmoney.com and while you're there, please sign up for our newsletter so you have the latest information on new episodes and blog posts. Until next time, keep creating freedom in your life today.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai